Mzta? I don't know sometimes i don't want to write things anymore coz it only drained me emotionally, but I want to.i want to express how i feel right now, maybe because it's been years already and many things have changed. My parents gets older and my siblings gets older as well. I remember when i was young i always wanted to help my family, my siblings were still young then, i am like grade three?at that age im already so concerned of my family, hearing my parents fight all the time and shouts so loud that keeps me inside the house, the insecurity started to birth, im ashamed going out, neighbors and even relatives would talk behind our backs, i don't play to children my age, i would just stay at home and be with my siblings and take care of them in a very silent and dark room..
Now that i grow old, im still into my siblings supporting them in their studies almost everything, i am supporting two high schools and three colleges with my dad's regular medicines and the basic necessities at home, financially i am the only one they can depend. i'm happy that i have work that enables me to support all their needs but sometimes i get choked and wonder what i got into..it reach to the point that I even go into debt to meet all needs...
One is graduating..im happy that they are in school now, they have to focus solely in school unlike my time i need to work as a janitor in a school to support my studies...
I still need to hold on, our youngest is still third year high school and my parents gets older and sick..
I thought im just by myself, but i realized that my journey began with God even from the very beginning...even from those times of obscurity.
And my journey will go on and on..so confident that I will be able to finish the race to the end, knowing that I have SOMEONE my side..